Dutch and Western Culture
From AcculturationWiki
Contents |
Introduction
If you come from outside of a Western society, you may experience some things here in Holland that can shock you, startle you, amaze you, annoy you, fascinate you or, usually, all of the above! If you come from a country in the Anglo-Saxon world or in Western Europe, the shock may be less big for you. In any case, things will be different than you are used to. On this page, certain aspects typical to Dutch culture will be discussed. Keep in mind, however, that everyone is different! Not all Dutch people will respond the same way, not everyone will act as described on this web site. This information is just general information about how some or most people behave in certain situations, and what you can expect when you come here, so that it will not shock you as much as it would if you didn't have any information. Furthermore, remember that you are 50% of the communication. If you allow yourself to be flexible and well-informed about Dutch culture, it will make the conversation with Dutch people easier even if they haven't done the same! Be also aware that you look at certain things from your own culture: you might find the directness of the Dutch rude, because it is rude in your culture. However, Dutch people find the directness not rude but rather a positive trait: in the Dutch culture, it is considered positive to be direct since it saves the time of going through all of the small talk, and it gives people a clear view of what they think. An introductional movie about Dutch culture, made by the University of Groningen:
Direct way of speaking
If you ask a group of international people what is the one thing that is peculiar about Dutch people, they will undoubtedly tell you that Dutch people are so direct in their way of speaking. The Dutch tend to come to the point quickly, without first going through a series of conversational rituals, and use a lot of eye contact. As said before, the Dutch consider this directness as a positive personality trait. However, to foreigners, this may seem intimidating or rude, especially in cultures where matters are discussed with extreme politeness. Try not to take offense if Dutch people are (in your opinion) too direct to you; they are not trying to be rude, it is just their learned way of speaking. Furthermore, in Dutch, it is possible to politely ask for something without saying the equivalent of "please", so Dutch people often will not say "please" when asking for something in English either. This may be misinterpreted by native speakers of English as a rudeness, but is rarely intended that way. About 85% of the people in the Netherlands are able to speak reasonable English, so don't worry if you don't speak Dutch! Regularly, if you try to speak Dutch to someone from Holland, they will reply in English to make it easier for you.
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Social interaction and privacy
The first time international students ride on a train, they may notice one characteristic of Dutch people: their reserve towards strangers. The seats will fill up in a fashion that postpones proximity as long as possible, and unless they are acquainted, people seldom speak to each other. You may think of this behavior as mere unfriendliness, but if you see it as respect for the other person's privacy, perhaps combined with shyness, you will undoubtedly find living among the Dutch more enjoyable. This behavior should not discourage foreigners in their actions. Dutch people are curious and when addressed will often try to converse or be of assistance. The Dutch are reserved in public and do not often touch each other or display anger. They will, however, expect eye contact while speaking with someone. Looking away or staring at the ground is considered impolite and may be perceived as lying. (Young) Dutch people meeting each other for the first time do not usually wait to be introduced. They extend their hand for a handshake, make eye contact, say their name, and wait to hear the name of the other person. However, people who already know each other also shake hands if they haven't seen each other for a while. If they are good friends or relatives, they will exchange three kisses on the cheeks.
Non-competetiveness
In many other Western cultures, the school system and work environment is very competitive. In Holland, however, this is less so. High value is placed here on team work and consensus, and a person who tries too hard to excel will be criticized as a 'solo artist' and excluded from the 'group'. This attitude stems from the past when the Netherlands was divided in different regions and people had to work together in order to survive.
Food
The Dutch normally have three meals a day. They start the day with a breakfast, which might include a large cup of coffee (or tea), some sandwiches, fruit or cereal. Although you might find this very early it is time to have lunch between noon and 1.00 p.m. In general, The Dutch do not have a hot meal at lunch. Most people will have a sandwich, perhaps some soup and fruit. The time for dinner is about 6.00 p.m. Dinner might be a traditional meal with potatoes, meat and vegetables or rice or pasta (especially popular among students). You should try one of the many Dutch deserts called ‘vla’. It is similar to yoghurt and is available in many different tastes. At 8.00 p.m. people gather again to have a cup of coffee and some biscuits or cake. Of course you will understand that not everyone sticks to this rigid scheme. Food does not play a major role in hospitality, in contrast with other cultures. You will probably be offered something to drink, but do not expect a meal unless the invitation specifically mentiones 'dinner'. When you invite someone to dinner, do not automatically expect the invitation to be returned. Food is not considered that important. Furthermore, if you are invited by another student to dine at his/her house, it may be even the case that you are asked to share the cost of ingredients. This is quite normal in Holland. It is polite to offer to help out with the dishes or cleaning the table. Out of same politeness, the host will usually decline the offer. In restaurants, usually the bill is split, or sometimes even everyone pays for what they actually had. In bars, usually everyone buys rounds in turns. Another option is that people all pay for example 10 euro to one person and that person gets the drinks the whole night.
